Killed by accident

I didn't mean to kill a lizard early in the morning. I wore my shoe and was ready to go to work when I saw an insect rushing out of the wooden door. I jumped frantically, as if the moment doremon-sees-mouse.

When I saw the smeared red blood stain, I know that I have accidentally stepped on the speedy insect. It was a teenager home lizard. The tail is still intact but the intestine came out. The blood was smeared around, most likely is due to my shoe, which lands on the teenager lizard and bring some of the blood stain to another nearby area.

I am responsible to clear up the mess. I tried to use a newspaper to scoop the little body into an opened plastic bag. The folded edge of the newspaper is too big to scrape the body up. In the end, I use a fastfood brochure (which looks more pleasing) to lift the lizard up. It was either the head and hand came up or the tail and leg. The gluey adhesive nature of the lizard does seem to work well now.

As I am in a rush for time. I had to make it fast and done properly. Once determined, the part on putting the little body into a bag becomes easier. I screamed a bit.. after the lizard was in the bag. My mother came out of the kitchen and I showed her everything. She offered to help me wipe away the stains while I can go and catch the train.

During the journey, I keep having flash back of the image of the teenager lizard and its intestine outside it's little body, in an enlarged version. Killing the lizard is never my intention. I am very upset that I have been this panicky. Maybe to those who are able to roll a newspaper and whack on a cockroach, the whole incident seems nothing, but to my family, I am so guilty to have taken the life of a living creature.